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Date: 2017-06-01 11:30 am (UTC)I have no problem with politically incorrect questions, no worries, and I raise you a politically incorrect answer: nope, they're Ukrainian. Their relationship somewhat reminds me of abusive coach/athlete relationships I've seen in the skating world.
A long long time ago, when she was very little, Froglet did terrible at a skating competition - she fell three times and was in tears - so I ran over to her, gave her a long, long hug, and then went to the dressing room with her. In the dressing room, there was another competitor who'd fallen several times; she was sitting on a bench, hunched and red faced and crying, and in front of her was this woman who was literally YELLING at her in Russian (or what I assumed to be Russian - I've heard a lot of Russian in my life, so even if I don't speak the language at all I recognize a Slavic language when I hear it.) Froglet and I sat huddled together, as far from them as we could, while Froglet changed and got her stuff together. The minute we were out the door my tiny Froglet turned to me and hugged me hard, burying her head against me, whispering "thank you for being my mommy".
I've never forgotten this because it was that awful. I don't know if the woman yelling at that child was a coach or a parent, and I am certainly not saying that this is something Slavic people do in general, but it's possible that it's culturally less unacceptable than it is here? I don't really know.
V's mom has a hard life, that much is for sure. She's done many brave, strong things in her life, but right now she's under a lot of stress - she's selling her small business and moving from Toronto, she doesn't yet know where she will live next - and it looks like it's taking a toll on her and she's taking it out on her daughter. If she's said to V "I hate you" (I am not doubting V's word, just questioning her interpretation of things, because I think they fought really hard), that's just... I don't even know.
ANYWAYS. They've had a rocky relationship for as long as we've known them. There have been ups and downs and quite ridiculous moments (the mom once took V to a restaurant to celebrate one of V's achievements, they got into an argument, and the mom left the table and went home, leaving V behind. V had to make her own way home on public transit. And it's just an example.)