Dear everyone
May. 13th, 2004 06:42 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
la_rainetteDear Cat,
You, my dear, are an awsome predator. Your slick fur, your powerful claws, your big white teeth are designed to impress the prey that has the misfortune to cross your path. So stop pooping in the bathtub and go kick some ant butt
Love,
La rainette.
No. I am NOT your mom.
Dear Tadpole,
I am very impressed and proud. You're a great little helper. I love it when you clear the table. But please don't put the plates and forks in the garbage. They can be washed and reused.
And while I'm at it, IS THAT WHAT YOU DID WITH THE SOCKS?
Love, Mom.
Dear Froglet,
Yes, of course I will still love you if you decide you don't want to go to baseball practice anymore. It breaks my heart that you can even think I might love you less. And you, will you still love me if I make you go to baseball practice a bit longer? So that I can cheer you on properly? Now that I know what's going on on the field?
And no, you can't marry him. I dont care if he cuts your hair well or calls you princess, he's still much too old for you.
Love, Mom.
Dear Husband,
I love you. You know I do. But please, please don't expect me to do the gardening. The earth is full of hideous, squirming, gross creepy-crawlies ready to bite me if I grab them. AND I DON'T CARE IF THEY DON'T HAVE ANY TEETH. They still creep me out. As much as the ants creep the cat out I'm afraid. Yeah, we have ants in the basement again.
Love, your creeped-out wife.
You, my dear, are an awsome predator. Your slick fur, your powerful claws, your big white teeth are designed to impress the prey that has the misfortune to cross your path. So stop pooping in the bathtub and go kick some ant butt
Love,
La rainette.
No. I am NOT your mom.
Dear Tadpole,
I am very impressed and proud. You're a great little helper. I love it when you clear the table. But please don't put the plates and forks in the garbage. They can be washed and reused.
And while I'm at it, IS THAT WHAT YOU DID WITH THE SOCKS?
Love, Mom.
Dear Froglet,
Yes, of course I will still love you if you decide you don't want to go to baseball practice anymore. It breaks my heart that you can even think I might love you less. And you, will you still love me if I make you go to baseball practice a bit longer? So that I can cheer you on properly? Now that I know what's going on on the field?
And no, you can't marry him. I dont care if he cuts your hair well or calls you princess, he's still much too old for you.
Love, Mom.
Dear Husband,
I love you. You know I do. But please, please don't expect me to do the gardening. The earth is full of hideous, squirming, gross creepy-crawlies ready to bite me if I grab them. AND I DON'T CARE IF THEY DON'T HAVE ANY TEETH. They still creep me out. As much as the ants creep the cat out I'm afraid. Yeah, we have ants in the basement again.
Love, your creeped-out wife.
