la_rainette | Baking is precision

So. Froglet briefly visited the hospital yesterday

She had complained that "going pee-pee hurt". Since she's extra-modest (will chat up any good-looking boy, but won't show her knickers to her own mother), we decided it would be best if I took her to Sick Kids (to rule out the urinary tract infection). So we went, me looking like a snarky bulldog (no pain killers whatsoever), Froglet with a wobbly chin and tears in her eyes ("I don't want to go! I don't want to go-ho-ho-ho!")

To cut a long story short, she's fine. She peed in a little recipient, and then hollered down the hall: "MOM! PUT IT IN YOUR PURSE! I DON'T WANT ANYONE TO SEE MY PEE-PEE!" OK, honey, you know what? No-one had noticed, now they're all staring. NOT a good idea to shout like that.

And then, while the doctor was examining her, something happened: all the piece of apparatus began beeping, and my purse started vibrating on the floor, and the doctor said: "your purse is ringing". It bloody well is not, I replied. Yes, it is, she said.

Sure enough, Husband's cell phone, that he had dropped into my purse at the last second, was giving out frantic signals.

I am not fond of cell phones. They are like the tamagoshis from Hell, seeking attention in the most inconvenient moments, and ignoring you altogether when you need them. I don't have one, myself, but Husband occasionally drops his into my purse. This one is brand new, and Husband hadn't bothered showing me more than the basic function: How to Call Home When the Doctor is Done With Your Child. I didn't know how to pick up the call. I didn't know how to turn it off. I promptly dropped the damn thing when it started vibrating in my hand. The doctor was extremely amused.

The good doctor sent me home with a prescription for Not Much (since Froglet is Not Sick). The whole thing predictably took about 4 hours (which is why Husband was getting a little bit nervous).

And about baking, for

_skye_ who would like to know how to make croissants ;o)

I am not a great cook, but I bake well. I've discussed this with a friend of mine, who belongs to the other category (cooks well, dislikes baking), and we've come to the conclusion that it is not only due to our food preferences. Admittedly I have a very sweet tooth, but my friend does too.

But while cooking is creatively experimenting with ingredients, baking is all about precision. Baking is when my inner Snape takes over and calculates to the gram how much of each ingredient goes into a recipe. Baking is like chemistry, like a potions class: stay focussed and follow the instructions to the letter, and it can't go wrong.

I like that. I can go on autopilot and bake for hours, and it soothes my soul in moments of turmoil. I'm not interested in experimenting, I have my kids for that ;). I use baking as a way to calm down. I follow the most complicated recipes to the letter. Snape would have loved having me as a student. Er. Ahem.

So. I have scales, precise to the gram; I have plenty of thermometers that will give me the temperature of caramel, or of the inside of a cake. And I measure quantities with rigorous, almosty religious precision.

My first Northern American cookbook gave me nightmares.

Now, I can convert from grams to ounces, I've had to do it before, for a French cookie recipe for which I wanted to use a British measuring glass. I had to divide all the quantities by 28.35 (1 ounce is 28.35 grams. I haven't checked, I still remember, and that was over 10 years ago. I had to calculate by hand, see. It scarred me forever, that moment.)

But conversions from weight to volume, I can't do. Also, couting in cup, 1/2 cups, 1/4 cups when you are used to dealing with grams (1/125th of a cup, roughly, if we are talking flour) and being extremely precise is very frustrating. Also, the weight/volume conversion isn't the same for each ingredient. Talk about complicated.

So, skye, I will translate the croissants recipe for you, but it's going to take a little time, and you might end up with strange quantities, such as 9.5/10th of a cup, or 29/35th of a cup. I won't approximate, because by baker's heart and my cartesian brain won't let me. But you just go ahead ;)

It's not a complicated recipe, it's just very, very long. (Roll it out, fold it just so, freezer 30 minutes, fridge 1 hour, start all over.)

If anyone else is interested, say so in the comments, and I'll post the recipe in LJ. Else, I'll send it to

_skye_ privately (if that's OK with you, skye)