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la_rainetteI am having a Playschool General Meeting tonight. *takes deep breath*
One word.
Sunscreen.
This is how our last meeting went last year.
President: Any other item you would like to discuss?
A Mom *lifts hand* Yes! Me! Here!
President: Yes?
Mom: Our playground is in the sun; the Playschool class lasts for 2 hours and a half, the kids go out for the last half hour, and EVERYONE knows sunscreen is only effective during two hours.
everyone *shifts uncomfortably*
Mom: and the kids go outside! For half an hour!! In the glaring sun!!! With sunscreen that doesn't work anymore!!!!
President: so, what do you suggest we do?
Annoying Sunscreen Mom: Put sunscreen on them before they go out!!!!!
So far, so good.
President: We can put it on them at circle time.
Annoying Sunscreen Mom: Well, yes, but no, cos they wash their hands afterwards. So the sunscreen is all gone.
Another Helpful mom: We can put the sunscreen on their hands after hand washing?
ASM: Well, yes, but no, cos then they have snack. They'll eat the sunscreen off their fingers. I'm not sure how good that is for them.
Yet Another Slightly Impatient Mom, Anxious To Get The Meeting Done So As To Resume Normal Life: How about we put it on their hands after snack?
ASM: Well, yes, but no, cos then they go out and the sunscreen needs 30 minutes to take effect.
Long silence while those who aren't reflecting on the situation at hand are trying to figure out the best way to discreetly kill ASM and get rid of the body.
President: Can we all vote on the necessity to put sunscreen on the kids.
Alas. The Sunscreen Fans win the vote.
President *sighs* OK. So. We'll try and figure out when and how to put it on the kids. I'll buy a big bottle of sunscreen for all the kids.
ASM: Well yes, but no, cos some of them might have ALLERGIES. also, GERMS! Eeeek, eeep and eeew. each kid should bring his/her own bottle in his/her backpack.
President *stares*
Rainette *breaks pen*
And this is an abridged version, I'd like to add. The real thing lasted for 45 minutes.
That same evening, as I was telling Husband the whole story, including the sad bit (nope, Adorable Sam's mom and I didn't go for a drink afterwards, because the meeting was too bloody long), Husband exclaimed in European disbelief: what, sunscreen? Now? It's only 10 degrees outside!
And even though we're talking centigrades and not Fahrenheit, he certainly had as point. It was a cold, rainy spring, yet look! The kids had SUNSCREEN on them!
The Sunscreen Discussion made us the laughingstock of the whole community. A Playschool friend who had missed the meeting (something you do not want to do, cos you get an extra duty day, yuck!) heard three different versions of The Discussion at her local playground, only one of which was actually told by someone who a) was a playchool parent, b) had been at the meeting.
The Sunscreen item was voted off at the next General Meeting, the one that took place at the beginning of this year, cos the Annoying Sunscreen Mom left the Playchool altogether. Last I've heard, she was trying to get her kid's Kindergarden teacher fired, because she was not "good enough".
But I still fear that we might get one of those surprise last minute items on our agenda tonight. And then? I swear, someone will get killed tonight. *sharpens axe*
One word.
Sunscreen.
This is how our last meeting went last year.
President: Any other item you would like to discuss?
A Mom *lifts hand* Yes! Me! Here!
President: Yes?
Mom: Our playground is in the sun; the Playschool class lasts for 2 hours and a half, the kids go out for the last half hour, and EVERYONE knows sunscreen is only effective during two hours.
everyone *shifts uncomfortably*
Mom: and the kids go outside! For half an hour!! In the glaring sun!!! With sunscreen that doesn't work anymore!!!!
President: so, what do you suggest we do?
Annoying Sunscreen Mom: Put sunscreen on them before they go out!!!!!
So far, so good.
President: We can put it on them at circle time.
Annoying Sunscreen Mom: Well, yes, but no, cos they wash their hands afterwards. So the sunscreen is all gone.
Another Helpful mom: We can put the sunscreen on their hands after hand washing?
ASM: Well, yes, but no, cos then they have snack. They'll eat the sunscreen off their fingers. I'm not sure how good that is for them.
Yet Another Slightly Impatient Mom, Anxious To Get The Meeting Done So As To Resume Normal Life: How about we put it on their hands after snack?
ASM: Well, yes, but no, cos then they go out and the sunscreen needs 30 minutes to take effect.
Long silence while those who aren't reflecting on the situation at hand are trying to figure out the best way to discreetly kill ASM and get rid of the body.
President: Can we all vote on the necessity to put sunscreen on the kids.
Alas. The Sunscreen Fans win the vote.
President *sighs* OK. So. We'll try and figure out when and how to put it on the kids. I'll buy a big bottle of sunscreen for all the kids.
ASM: Well yes, but no, cos some of them might have ALLERGIES. also, GERMS! Eeeek, eeep and eeew. each kid should bring his/her own bottle in his/her backpack.
President *stares*
Rainette *breaks pen*
And this is an abridged version, I'd like to add. The real thing lasted for 45 minutes.
That same evening, as I was telling Husband the whole story, including the sad bit (nope, Adorable Sam's mom and I didn't go for a drink afterwards, because the meeting was too bloody long), Husband exclaimed in European disbelief: what, sunscreen? Now? It's only 10 degrees outside!
And even though we're talking centigrades and not Fahrenheit, he certainly had as point. It was a cold, rainy spring, yet look! The kids had SUNSCREEN on them!
The Sunscreen Discussion made us the laughingstock of the whole community. A Playschool friend who had missed the meeting (something you do not want to do, cos you get an extra duty day, yuck!) heard three different versions of The Discussion at her local playground, only one of which was actually told by someone who a) was a playchool parent, b) had been at the meeting.
The Sunscreen item was voted off at the next General Meeting, the one that took place at the beginning of this year, cos the Annoying Sunscreen Mom left the Playchool altogether. Last I've heard, she was trying to get her kid's Kindergarden teacher fired, because she was not "good enough".
But I still fear that we might get one of those surprise last minute items on our agenda tonight. And then? I swear, someone will get killed tonight. *sharpens axe*
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no subject
Date: 2004-11-22 11:23 pm (UTC)Granted, I have no personal experience of the importance of sunscreen; melanin has worked fine for me so far, and I need my Vitamin D, anyway. But really, half an hour? If your particular kid is especially susceptible to sunburn, then let the President or whoever's in charge know so he/she will have sunscreen applied at the proper time. Why trouble everyone else?
At least the rule is gone now. And hopefully people still remember The Sunscreen Discussion, because that'll help deter any imitations. Nobody will want to be compared to Annoying Sunscreen Mom!
In other news, have not yet received cookies. Wah.
no subject
Date: 2004-11-23 06:56 pm (UTC)No-one did the sunscreen dance last night. *kisses axe*
no subject
Date: 2004-11-24 09:25 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-11-23 12:16 am (UTC)(Plus, I thought sunscreen, especially higher SPFs, were good for 3-4 hours unless one sweats profusely, swims, etc. Am I ignorant, or is the lady weird? Or both? Also, if she's so concerned, she should dress her children in loose-fitting, long-sleeved garments, which work as sunscreen for all but the most sensitive for such a short time as a half-hour. I live in Florida! Surely the sun isn't harsher up there than it is here at high noon on the beach.)
no subject
Date: 2004-11-23 06:58 pm (UTC)Yeah, this year we discussed the whole thing briefly again and decided it was the responsibility of the parents. They are welcome to stick around and put sunscreen on their kids at the appropriate time. But I do think a good, long-lasting sunscreen should work for 2 1/2 hours, at least!
no subject
Date: 2004-11-23 12:43 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-11-23 07:00 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-11-23 03:09 am (UTC)*switches from giggling to laughing hysterically* That's so funny! I can see the President trying to be incredibly patient (and failing) while the sunscreen-obsessed mother makes everybody's life a living hell and the rest of the moms try not to commit murder.
I'm so sorry... hopefully this year it goes better.
no subject
Date: 2004-11-23 07:02 pm (UTC)This year, when asked if anyone else wanted to raise another point, little 7-months-old Meggie (who was sitting on her mom's lap) burped noisily, and we all laughed. *g*
no subject
Date: 2004-11-23 04:44 am (UTC)But if I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it.
no subject
Date: 2004-11-23 07:05 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-11-23 05:18 am (UTC)Leaving them at home with big sisters, that's what.......Seriously though, these meetings last till 10 sometimes...
[/rant]
The Sunscreen Paradox sounds long and painful. And you retell it hilariously. :D
no subject
Date: 2004-11-23 07:08 pm (UTC)Now, of course, Husband would much rather stay home, so he takes care of the kids, and I go. He's happy to escape any sunscreen discussion we may have.
no subject
Date: 2004-11-24 03:44 am (UTC)I'm with your husband though - the sunscreen discussions sound traumatizing.
no subject
Date: 2004-11-24 12:09 am (UTC)